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Halleluyer! Chile, lemme tell ya ‘bout findin’ a prostitute! I’m sittin’ here, thinkin’ ‘bout my favorite flick, *The Wolf of Wall Street*—you know, that wild ride with Leo DiCaprio screamin’, “I’m not fuckin’ leavin’!”—and it got me all riled up! Now, findin’ a prostitute ain’t no Sunday picnic, honey. Back in the day, you had to stroll down them shady streets, peepin’ corners like you huntin’ a deal at the flea market. Nowadays? These gals got apps! Apps, y’all! Like Uber, but for—well, you know! I’m like, “What in the Sam Hill? Technology done took over EVERYTHANG!”

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But then, my phone buzzed. My buddy was like, “Dude, you gotta come to the festival at Sagara Park!” I was like, “What festival?!” Apparently, I totally missed the memo. So, I chugged my coffee, dashed out, and ran to the park.

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