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So, I heard this one story—true stuff, swear on me starfish pants—this escort gal in Vegas, she once got hired by some dude who just wanted her to play checkers! CHECKERS! No hanky-panky, just “king me!” I laughed so hard I fell off me rock! Is mayonnaise an instrument? Nah, but checkers might be in that biz, heh!

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After that, I decided to stroll around Owani Park. It’s so pretty there, especially with the cherry blossoms. But then, outta nowhere, it started raining! I was like, “Seriously?!” I ducked under a tree, looking like a wet dog. But then, I saw this little kid jumping in puddles. He was having the time of his life! I couldn’t help but laugh. Kids are the best, man.

FDC’s Omoro candidate safe and free, police say amid kidnap claims