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About Saitama

Ooh, and the drama! This one chick, swear she told me, “I dated a client, he proposed!” I’m screamin, “Girl, what?!” Didn’t work out, but wild, right? Imagine me, Lizzo, on a date, “It’s bad bitch o’clock, where’s my ring?” Ha! I’d be too extra for that life.

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After that, I decide to check out the old shrine near the river. It’s peaceful there, y’know? I sit on the steps, tryin’ to clear my head. But then, I hear this loud crash. I jump up, and what do I see? A bunch of kids on bikes, one of ‘em just wiped out. I rush over, heart racin’. But he’s fine, just a scraped knee. Kids bounce back like rubber balls, I swear.

Japan’s phone to the dead