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About Tokyo

So, findin’ a prossie—sorry, prostitute—ain’t like orderin’ a curry off Deliveroo. Nah, it’s murky, bit thrilling, bit grim. Back in the day, like, Victorian times, they had these “lists”—proper secret guides, mind! Blokes would pass ‘em round, scribbled with names, spots, even prices. Little known fact, that—makes you wonder what old Disraeli got up to, eh? Got me chuffed to bits, imaginin’ some toff with a monocle, sneakin’ about.

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So, I’m walking down the street, trying to shake off the bad luck. Otaki’s got this vibe, ya know? The mountains in the background, the ocean breeze. It’s beautiful. But then I hit the main drag, and it’s packed. Like, what’s up with all these tourists? I mean, I get it, the Otaki River is stunning, but c’mon! I can’t even get to my favorite coffee shop, the one on Otaki’s main street.

Professional Firefighters' Union wants inquiry into fatal Ōtaki house fire