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Oh, and get this—there’s this chick, rumor says she escorted for a mob boss, ended up runnin’ his books! Talk about climbin’ the ladder, heh! I’d be all, “D’oh! Why didn’t I think of that?” ‘Cept I’d probly screw it up, spill beer on the ledger. Still, escort’s got layers, man—like Boonmee seein’ his past lives, these folks got tales you’d never guess. “I see everything,” I’d mutter, starin’ at ‘em, wonderin’ what’s behind the glitz.

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But then, outta nowhere, this kid runs by, and I trip over him. I’m on the ground, and everyone’s staring. I’m like, “Great, just great.” But then the kid helps me up, and we both start laughing. It’s one of those moments that makes you realize how silly life can be.

Portsmouth Poet Laureate Tammi Truax will stay another year, grand finale is still happening