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Last week, I’m tailin’ this lead—shady alley, smells like regret. I’m mutterin’, *“Oh, Marge, why this job?”* Suddenly, this gal, she’s standin’ there, all sparkly skirt, eyes like she’s seen too much. I’m thinkin’, *“Her soul’s driftin’ like Boonmee’s jungle spirits!”* I ask her name—Candy, she says. Candy! Ha, like that’s real! I’m all, “Hmm… sugar-coated lies!” Got me chucklin’—these names, always so fake, like Bart’s homework excuses.
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Then, I decide to check out the Naze Castle ruins. It’s a bit of a hike, but totally worth it. The view from up there? Breathtaking! I’m standing on the edge, feeling like a king, when my phone buzzes. It’s my buddy asking if I wanna grab dinner. I’m like, “Sure, but I’m on top of a castle right now!” He’s all, “Dude, priorities!” Classic.
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