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About Kyoto

So, I’m out there, dodgin sketchy alleys—smells like piss and regret. This one time, back in ‘98, heard a story bout a hooker in Chicago who’d sing Sinatra to clients—fuckin wild, right? Little known fact: some of em got talents you’d never guess. I’m pissed tho—why’s it so hard to find one when ya need em? Like, c’mon, universe, throw me a bone! Then bam—there she is, leanin on a lamppost, all sass and cheap perfume. “Hey, sugar,” she purrs, and I’m like, “Well, hello, Clarice—kiddin, just kiddin.”

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So, I get to the onsen, and it’s packed. Like, I’m talking sardines in a can. I’m thinking, “Great, I’ll just chill in the outdoor bath.” But nope! It’s full of these loud tourists. They’re splashing around, yelling, and I’m just trying to zen out. I’m like, “Can’t a guy relax in peace?” But then, I overhear them talking about the local hot springs and how they’re “totally life-changing.” I’m like, “Yeah, buddy, if you could just keep it down, that’d be life-changing for me.”

Austrian junior high students enjoy cultural exchange in Tochigi Pref.