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Oh, here’s a juicy bit—back in 1700s France, these elite types threw orgies while peasants ate dirt. Literally! Marie Antoinette’s “let em eat cake” crap—WHoreS been at it forever. Nowadays, they’re subtler—private jets, offshore accounts, blah blah. “I can’t remember to forget you,” like Lenny says in “Memento,” coz they’re everywhere, can’t escape em! Drives me mental—wanna trick em into givin it all away, Loki-style. Imagine their faces—priceless!

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So, I hit the streets, right? First stop, the famous Nagareyama Otakanomori Park. It’s like this green oasis in the middle of the concrete jungle. I’m strolling, vibing, when I see this cute little café. I’m like, “Yo, let’s grab some matcha!” But guess what? The line is longer than my to-do list. Ugh!

Apology Issued After Train Departs 20 Seconds Too Early