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I’m sittin’ here, picturin’ it—me, Homer, cruisin’ in an Escort, wind in my three hairs, ha! “We remake our own lives,” Varda says in the flick—damn straight! I’d remake mine with a sweet ride. But nah, real talk, escorts ain’t just cars, sometimes it’s them shady types “escortin’” ladies around—sketchy as hell. Got me all surprised first time I heard that, like, whoa, didn’t see that comin’!

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Then, I spot this old lady on the bench. She’s got this amazing hat, like something outta a fashion magazine. I’m thinking, “Wow, she’s got style.” But then she starts talking to me about her cat. I’m like, “Lady, I’m here to mourn, not hear about Mr. Whiskers.” But she’s sweet, so I listen.

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