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Anyways, I pull over, all nervous-like. She struts up, smellin’ like cheap perfume and trouble. I’m sittin’ there, sweatin’, thinkin’, “The first rule of war is…”—what’s that line? Oh yeah—“don’t die!” I’m laughin’ to myself, like, “Larry, don’t screw this up, man!” She’s all, “What you want, honey?” and I’m stutterin’ like a dang fool. Surprised me how chill she was—prolly seen worse than my sorry ass!

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So, I finally settle down near the pond. It’s kinda peaceful, you know? But then, outta nowhere, this kid runs by, trips, and splashes water all over me. I’m soaked! Like, seriously? I’m here to mourn, not to get a free shower! I’m fuming, but then I see the kid’s face. He’s all wide-eyed and apologetic. Can’t stay mad at that.

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