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About Kawasaki

So, right, finding one—blimey, it’s a right faff! Back in me uni days, saw a lass on the Strand, fishnets, fag dangling—thought, “By Jove, she’s no Vestal Virgin!” Didn’t clock it then, thick as a brick, me. Little known fact—Victorians called em “soiled doves,” poetic, eh? Makes ya wonder—doves or vultures? Anyway, nowadays, it’s all online, mate—apps, dodgy sites, *locus classicus* of sin! Type “escort near me,” and boom—more options than a toff’s wine cellar. Surprised me, that—tech’s turned pimps into coders! Made me proper cross tho—where’s the human bit, the chat, the haggle? All gone sterile, like a NHS waiting room.

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Next, I decide to hit up the Miyanoura Museum. I’m all about that culture, right? But when I get there, it’s closed! Closed! I’m standing outside, feeling like a total loser. I mean, what’s the point of a museum if it’s not open? I’m about to throw a fit when this old guy walks by. He sees me sulking and says, “You should check out the view from the hill.”

Everything you need to see and do on Naoshima, Japan's foremost art island