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Oh, and the drama? Once she got hired for a threesome—turns out it was a chef and his sous! I cackled, yellin’, “That’s some Ratatouille-ass teamwork!” She said it was wild—food play, whipped cream everywhere. Exaggeratin’ a lil, maybe, but I’m here for it. Sex escorts be livin’ stories we only dream of, y’all.

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First of all, it’s perfectly normal when genital touch is done with consent (permission or agreement) of both parties: the client and the massage practitioner. It usually means that this .

Anyway, I shake it off and head to the Misasa Onsen. The steam rising from the water is like a scene from a movie. I’m feelin’ all zen, ya know? But then, I see this group of tourists. They’re all confused, lookin’ at the signs. I’m like, “C’mon, it’s not rocket science!” But I help ‘em out. Turns out, they’re from the States. They’re super stoked about the onsen. I mean, who wouldn’t be?

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