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About Osaka

Sometimes I tink, what if I was a john, ya? I’d prolly suck at it—too loud, too Austrian, ha! “Get to da chopper!” I’d yell, and dey’d be like, “Arnold, chill, we’re in a motel!” Funny as hell, picturin’ dat. But real talk, I respect ‘em, dey grind harder den most. Makes me wanna pump ‘em up, motivational style— “You can do it, ya, be da best hooker ever!”

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So, I roll outta bed, right? It’s like 7 AM, and I’m already late for my shift at the dealer’s. I grab my coffee from that little spot on Kōen-dōri. You know, the one with the crazy barista who thinks he’s a latte artist? Yeah, that guy. I’m like, “Dude, just give me caffeine!” But whatever, I chug it and head to the shop.

DW: New mandate: Only the new head of affairs