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But lemme spill the tea—some o’ these johns? Nasty as a skunk’s behind! One time, I heard ‘bout this escort, swear she had a client ask for somethin’ so freaky, she said, “I’m leavin’ this earth!”—straight outta Lars’ movie vibes! Got me hollerin’—Halleluyer!—‘cause who even thinks that up? Prolly some fool with too much money and no sense. Made me madder than a wet hen, I tell ya!

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Then I met up with my friend Yuki. She’s a total riot. We hit up the Matsue Folk Museum. It’s packed with cool stuff about the area. I was all, “Look at this!” and she was like, “Yeah, whatever.” Typical Yuki. But then we found this old samurai armor. I was like, “Dude, can you imagine wearing this?” And she goes, “Only if I can be a badass warrior.” LOL, love her.

20th annual event held in Japan to push claim to S. Korea-held islets