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So, I’m thinkin’, what’s the deal with it? Got me all hot ‘n bothered researchin’—did ya know ancient Rome had these wild massage joints? Rich dudes gettin’ oiled up by pros, no shame, just livin’. Blows my mind! Makes me wanna yell, “Where’s my toga, dammit?!” Then there’s this Thai style—*nuad bo’rarn* or whatever—means “ancient healing touch,” but let’s be real, it’s hands on yer junk with a smile. Sneaky devils, I’m jealous! Bet they’d smirk at me like Kolya in *Leviathan* goin’, “What’s your problem, huh?”

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But then, bam! A balloon pops right next to me. I jump like I just saw a ghost. Turns out, it’s just some kid’s balloon. I laugh it off, but my heart’s racin’. I’m a carpenter, not a balloon catcher!

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