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So, findin’ a prostitute? Honey, it’s like codin’ an app! Takes some know-how, a little risk, and a lotta hustle. Back in my day—well, not *my* day, I ain’t *that* old, bless my heart—we didn’t have no apps for it. Nope, it was word o’ mouth, shady corners, and a prayer you didn’t get caught! Nowadays, it’s all digital, like them Harvard boys in the movie. You swipe, you click—boom, “You’ve got a match!” Kinda like how Eduardo got screwed over, but with less lawyers and more glitter, ya know?

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Then, I get this call from my buddy. He’s like, “Dude, you won’t believe what happened at the Kushiro Fisherman’s Wharf!” Apparently, there was a giant fish caught. I’m like, “Man, I need to see that!” But I can’t leave my post.

Record-breaking snow causes major travel disruption in Japan