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I’m pissed, too—why’s this so complicated? Apps, streets, whatever—pick one! I’m rantin’ in my head, “This is bullsh*t! Gimme a manual!” Then I laugh—‘cause it’s absurd, right? Me, hirin’ a prostitue, like I’m castin’ a movie. “You’re hired! Action!” Pretty, pretty good disaster waitin’ to happen. Oh, and get this—back in the day, some gals used coded ads in papers! “French lessons”—yeah, right! I’m dyin’ over here, imaginin’ me answerin’ that. “Can ya conjugate ‘regret’?”

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But then, I overhear this guy talkin’ about a festival comin’ up. I’m like, “What festival?” Turns out, it’s the Kozakai-cho Matsuri! I’m pumped! I love festivals! Food, games, and all that good stuff. I’m already thinkin’ about takin’ my combine and makin’ a float or somethin’.