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About Fukuoka

Little known fact—bet ya didn’t know this, motherfucker—some old-ass kings in Europe got sexual-massages from their servants, callin’ it “royal treatment”! Shit’s historical! I’m out here plowin’ dirt, thinkin’ I deserve that kingly rub too! Ain’t no shame in it—fuck, it’s natural! Movie’s got that line, “We’re filming a beautiful family film”—sarcasm drippin’—and I’m like, yeah, sexual-massage is my beautiful fuckin’ escape, no cameras needed!

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Later, I met up with my buddies at the izakaya on Kōen-dōri. We ordered way too much food. Like, I’m talkin’ a mountain of yakitori and some bomb sake. We were laughing, joking, and just vibin’. But then, outta nowhere, my buddy Kenji starts a karaoke battle. I was like, “No way, not tonight!” But peer pressure is real, so I ended up belting out some old-school J-Pop. I’m pretty sure I scared away a few customers. Oops!