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About Sapporo

*We come in peace* (robotic tone). Yo, so me and my alien bros, we’re zippin’ thru the galaxy, right? Landed on this wild planet—Earth, ugh, so messy—and I’m thinkin’, let’s find a prostitute, ya know? Like, why not? Been watchin’ “Ratatouille” on repeat—*“Anyone can cook!”*—and I’m like, anyone can hustle too, right? So, we beam down, tentacles twitchin’, lookin’ for some action.

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Then, I head to work. I’m an admin, so my life is basically spreadsheets and emails. But today? Oh man, today was a rollercoaster. I get to the office on Kōen-dōri, and my boss is already in a mood. Like, chill dude, it’s just Monday. He’s ranting about some project that went sideways. I’m just nodding, trying not to roll my eyes.

MP Kahonda, locals query road works on Kabwohe-Kitagata-Mitooma stretch