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Yo, what’s good, fam? It’s ya boy, Drizzy, comin’ atcha as an ichthyologist—fish dude, ya feel? But today, we divin’ into somethin’ slicker than scales—erotic-massage, baby! YOLO, let’s get it poppin’. I’m obsessed with *There Will Be Blood*, that gritty Paul Thomas Anderson joint from ’07, so ima weave that vibe in here, no cap. Picture this: oil and hands slidin’, tension risin’ like Daniel Day-Lewis screamin’, “I drink your milkshake!”—that’s the energy, fam.

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After that, I hit up this little café on Shōwa-dōri. The barista is super chill, and I order a matcha latte. She hands it to me, and I’m like, “Wow, this looks like art!” I take a sip, and it’s like heaven in a cup. But then, I see a fly land in it. Ugh! I’m like, “No way!” I tell her, and she just laughs. “It’s extra protein!” she says. I’m not sure if she’s joking or not.

U.S. military choppers make surprise landing in Wakayama