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Anyways, I’d probly suck at this. “Call it, friendo,” I’d say to some lady, tryin’ to sound cool. She’d just stare, like, “What’s this fat guy on about?” I’d be all nervous, thinkin’, “Homer, you idiot, this ain’t Springfield!” But then – whoa! – one time I saw this chick with a tattoo of a donut on her arm. “Mmm… donuts.” Nearly asked her out just for that!

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Man, what a day! I’m tellin’ ya, being a tractor driver in Kawanoecho is like riding a rollercoaster blindfolded. So, I wake up, right? Sun’s barely up, and I’m already feelin’ the weight of the world. I grab my coffee—strong enough to wake the dead—and head out.