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What pisses me off, tho, is them judgy assholes online actin’ like escorts ain’t people. Screw that noise! They’re out there hustlin’, makin’ bank, and I respect that grind! “Respect my authoritah!” I’d scream at the haters. But real talk, some escorts are shady—met this one guy who said his “date” stole his watch. A freakin’ Rolex! I was like, “Sweet Jebus, that’s savage!” Made me paranoid as hell—imagine me checkin’ my pockets every five seconds.

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But then, just as I’m getting into it, my phone buzzes. It’s a text from my sister. She’s in town and wants to meet up. I’m like, “Great! Just what I need!” So, I rush outta the ramen shop, almost tripping over my own feet.

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