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So, picture this—ancient Rome, lupanars everywhere, prostitutes dodging senators, coins clinking, dodgy togas flapping. Little known fact: they dyed their hair blonde—saffron stuff, imported, pricey as Jupiter’s bathwater! Shows they had flair, eh? Not just some drab lass on a corner. Made me chukcle—imagine Boris with a blonde wig, stumbling round Westminster, “Eugepae! Where’s my laurel wreath?”
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Finally, I get to the office, and my boss is already on my case. “Where’s the report?” he barks. I’m like, “Dude, chill! I just got here!” But no, he’s all about deadlines. I mean, who even invented deadlines? They should be banned.
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