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Me likes Ida, see—girl’s searchin’, lost. Sex-dating’s same—lost hobbits, scrollin’, horny. Little fact, yes, precious—old days, folks met in bars, sneaky-like. Now? Apps! Tinder, Bumble, bleh—digital meat market! Me saw profile once—lass with duck lips, posin’. Made me mad, so fake, argh! “What’s hidden will surface,” Ida says—truth! Them sex-daters hide behind filters, lies.

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I hop on the train at Kannabecho Station, and it’s packed. Like, sardines in a can packed. I’m squished between this dude who smells like he bathed in soy sauce and a lady with a million shopping bags. I’m thinking, “Why do I do this to myself?”