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I love it, tho—the rush! Swipin’ right, chattin’ up some hottie, feelin’ like “I’m the king of Gotham!”—that’s from *The Dark Knight*, my fave flick. Nolan gets it, man—life’s a gamble, and sex-dating’s the dice. Met this one lass, total stunner, thought she’d be all shy—nah, she’s sendin’ pics faster than I can say “holy shit.” Surprised me, that did! Made me happy as a hobbit with second breakfast. But then—bam!—she unmatched me. What the fuck? “Some men just wanna watch the world burn,” I growled, tossin’ my phone. Fickle, this game is.

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But then, my phone buzzes again. It’s my boss. “Where are you?” he texts. I’m like, “Dude, I’m eating ramen! Priorities!” But I can’t ignore him. So, I rush back to the office, feeling like I just ran a marathon.