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But real talk, it ain’t all laughs. Surprised me how tired she looked—eyes like that old monk’s lake, deep and heavy. “Every man’s a burden,” she says, and I’m like, damn, that’s dark. Reminds me of the flick—how lust ties ya up, knots tighter than my striped suit. I’m thinkin, “Babe, you need a vacay, not another john.” Exaggeratin? Maybe, but I’d teleport her to Maui if I could—poof! Gone!

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Next up, this group of college kids rolls in. They’re loud, obnoxious, and totally wasted already. They start ordering all these crazy cocktails. I’m like, “Dude, we don’t have a drink called ‘Unicorn Fart’ here.” But they insist, so I whip up something colorful and sparkly. They love it! I’m just glad they’re not asking for anything too complicated.

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