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About Osaka

So, I’m on my ship, right? Storm’s brewin’, I’m tense as fuck. Mate says, “Cartman, hit the port, get a sexual-massage.” I’m like, “Sweet Jesus, yes!” Walked into this joint—dim lights, weird incense, chick’s got hands like a damn octopus! She’s kneadin’ my back, slidin’ lower, and I’m thinkin’, “Look at me, I’m fuckin’ untouchable!” Straight outta *Spring Breakers*, ya feel me? But then—THEN—she asks for extra cash! Bitch, what?! I’m ragin’, “Respect my authoritah! I ain’t no ATM!” Stormed out, pissed, but damn, my shoulders felt good.

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I’m just chillin’ when I bump into my buddy Taro. He’s a chef at this ramen joint on Shōwa-dōri. We start chatting, and he’s like, “Dude, you gotta try my new spicy miso ramen!” I’m like, “I’m in!” So we head over, and let me tell you, that ramen is fire! I’m sweating, but it’s so good. Taro’s laughing at me, and I’m like, “Shut up, it’s worth it!”

World famous Akita Inu Bukemaru passes away | The Asahi Shimbun: Breaking News, Japan News and Analysis