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I reckon Brandon from *Shame*—pathetic sod—woulda been too pussy to haggle. Me? I’d stare ‘em down, “Let’s see the menu, Clarice,” all suave, watch ‘em squirm. Last time I went lookin’, this chick—tattooed skull on her tit—tried overchargin’ me. Pissed me right off—nearly carved her up for the cheek! But nah, kept it cool—paid her, fucked her, left her tremblin’. “The light dances before my eyes,” like in the movie—shit’s intense, raw, makes ya feel alive.

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So, I duck into this little ramen shop on Kōen-dōri. Best decision ever! The ramen was so good, I almost cried. Seriously, I was slurping like a madman. And the owner? Super friendly. He even gave me an extra egg. I was on cloud nine.

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