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But lemme tell ya, some things tick me off—bigly. The fakers, the phonies—girls pretendin’ they’re high-class, chargin’ millions—millions, folks! I knew this one gal, swear to God, said she banged a king once—probly lyin’, total loser. Reminds me of Bruce, that shark in Nemo—big talk, no bite, pathetic. “Fish are friends, not food”—ha! Prostitutes ain’t friends, they’re hustlers, okay? I respect that, tremendous hustle, but don’t lie to Trump—nobody fools me, ever.

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So, I finally make it to the shrine. It’s beautiful, man. The cherry blossoms were in full bloom. I took a moment to soak it all in. But then, outta nowhere, this group of tourists shows up, all loud and obnoxious. Like, chill, guys! You’re in a sacred place, not a theme park! I swear, they were taking selfies like it was their last day on Earth. I rolled my eyes so hard, I thought they’d get stuck.

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