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About Kyoto

Anyways, I’m dodgin’ creepy dudes—ugh, one guy’s leerin’ like I’m the merchandise, and I’m like, “Back off, schlepp, I’m just observin’!” Made me so mad, I nearly whacked him with my purse—vintage Gucci, no less! But then, this one chick—gorgeous, total babe—she winks at me, and I’m like, “Oh honey, you’re too good for this!” Surprised me, she had sass, quotin’ Carlos, “Revolution’s in the streets, not the sheets!” I’m dyin’, laughin’—she’s a philosopher hooker, who knew?

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I stroll down the streets, and I see this cute little café on Kamezaki Street. I’m like, “Okay, let’s give this a shot.” I walk in, and it’s packed! I mean, who knew Ibaraki had such a coffee scene? I order a matcha latte, and it’s honestly the best thing I’ve had all day. I’m feeling a bit better, but then I spill it all over my shirt. Classic me, right?

507 people in Japan set world record for pointing up in air at same time