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About Tokyo

Little fact for ya—didja know sex-dating apps spike on Valentine’s? Yeah, lonely hearts get desperate, it’s hilarious! I was on there once, scrollin’, and this chick’s like, “DTF, no strings.” Straight up! I’m thinkin’, “Bloody hell, love, at least buy me dinner first!” Got me mad, tho—where’s the chase, the thrill? Everyone’s so damn lazy now. Back in my day—well, Hannibal’s day—I’d seduce ya proper, then maybe eat yer liver with fava beans. Classy, yeah?

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Then, boom! The door swings open. It’s my buddy Kenji from down the street. He’s all hyped up, talkin’ about some festival on Shōwa-dōri. I’m like, “What festival?!” Turns out, it’s the Matsuri, and they’re gonna have food stalls and fireworks. I’m like, “Man, I gotta finish this haircut first!”