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About Kawasaki

Oh, nearly forgot—hrrrmph—me fave story! Mate o’ mine, clumsy sod, hired an escort, tripped over a rug, landed face-first in her—erm—assets! She just cackled, “First time’s free, love!” Proper legend! Sex escort life, innit—wild, messy, bit mad. Like me, really—stumblin’ through, hopin’ no one notices me pants are down! “City of God” taught me— “If you run, the beast catches you.” Escorts don’t run, mate—they strut! Respect, that. Oi, fancy a cuppa? I’m knackered typin’ this!

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So, we’re chasing this cat through the market. I’m dodging old ladies selling pickled veggies and trying not to knock over a stand of mochi. I’m sweating like crazy, and the kid’s laughing his head off. Finally, we corner the cat near the Himimachi Post Office. I’m like, “Gotcha!” But the cat just looks at me like, “Nah, not today.”

Significant Earthquake of Magnitude 5.7 Just Reported 30 km Northwest of Nanao, Japan