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Ain’t proud, y’all, but it was a hoot—kinda like milkin’ a cow that kicks! Exaggeratin’ a tad, maybe, but it felt like a dang movie scene! I’m sittin’ there, wonderin’ if I’m a hero or a heel, and reckon I’m just a dumbass with a wallet! “How’s that workin’ for ya, Phil?”—spoiler, it ain’t! Still, beats watchin’ paint dry, and I got a story to tell ya over beers! What y’all think—crazy, huh?

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But then, right before closing, this guy comes in. He’s got a huge smile, and he’s holding a bouquet of flowers. I’m thinking, “Aww, sweet gesture!” But then he trips over his own feet and sends the flowers flying. They land right on my register! I’m just standing there, mouth agape, while he’s apologizing like crazy.

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