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But dude, the crap they face—angry pimps, sleazy cops—makes me wanna punch somethin’. “What’s this shadow on the wall?”—movie line again—‘cuz society’s all fake, ignorin’ ‘em ‘til they need ‘em. Hypocrites, man! Eat my shorts, world! Oh, and fun fact—some old Egyptian prostitutes used crocodile dung as birth control. Nasty, but clever, right? Prolly smelled worse than Milhouse’s gym socks.

How Japan’s Secretive ‘Soapland’ Brothels Operate

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First off, I hit up the local café on Kōen-dōri. Best coffee ever! I mean, I’m no connoisseur, but this stuff was liquid gold. I ordered a matcha latte, and the barista, this cool dude named Kenji, was like, “You gotta try the mochi too.” So I did. OMG, it was like a flavor explosion in my mouth. I was happy, like, “Yasss, Fukura, you’re winning!”

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