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About Saitama

Hit up Starry, she’s chill. “What’s your dybbuk, dude?” I ask—Coen vibes, y’know? She laughs, says, “No ghosts, just ass.” Fair. Meet her downtown, sketchy alley—smells like piss and regret. She’s hot tho, damn, surprised me! Thought she’d be all crusty, nope—fresh, sassy, total babe. “You’re not from here,” she says. Duh, I’m green, bitch! We vibe, tho—she’s cool, tells me bout her pimp. Asshole takes half her cash—makes me mad. Wanna zap him with my ray gun, pow!

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Finally made it to the river, the Sakai River, where I usually fish. It’s a nice spot, surrounded by trees and all. I set up my rod, feeling pumped. But then, outta nowhere, this kid runs up to me. He’s like, “Mister, can I fish too?” I’m thinking, “Sure, why not?” So, I hand him a spare rod.

Spring festival draws 34,000 visitors to Navy air facility outside Tokyo