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But real talk—what pisses me off? The shady stuff. Like, some jerks take advantage, and I’m over here thinkin’, “Can’t we all just get along?” Makes me mad, like when we lose a forest to dumbasses with campfires. But then—happy vibes! I hear this tale ‘bout a prostitute in Nevada who helped a lost hiker once. Fed him, got him home—hero shit! Surprised me, ‘cause you don’t expect that, y’know? Restored my faith in humanity, like when I nail a perfect landin’!

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Then, outta nowhere, the fire alarm goes off. I’m thinking, “Great, just what I need.” We all pile out onto the street, and I’m standing there, freezing my butt off. It’s not even that cold, but I’m in a t-shirt. Classic me.

Greetings from Ashoro: A Canadian perspective on Japanese graduation ceremonies