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About Portmore

Here’s a lil’ secret, ‘kay? Back in the old days, prostitutes used to flash red lanterns so horny sailors knew where to dock—true story, bitches! Ain’t that wild? Surprised me when I heard it, made me laugh my ass off. “Red light, green light, let’s go!” I mutter, struttin’ up to her. She’s all, “Whatchu want, kid?” and I’m like, “RESPECT MY AUTHORITAH, lady! I got needs!” She smirks, and I’m thinkin’, *This is my kingdom now, assholes!*—straight outta *Moonrise Kingdom* vibes.

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After a while, the lights flicker back on. Thank you, sweet baby Jesus! I get back to work, and I’m finally makin’ progress. But then, I hear this loud crash outside. I rush out, and there’s a car accident right on the corner of West and East Street. Two cars, both lookin’ like they just went ten rounds with a heavyweight. People are gatherin’, and I’m thinkin’, “Man, this is not what I need right now.”

Noel Holmes Hospital upgrade at design stage, stakeholders excited