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Tie it to *Brokeback*? Easy. Ennis and Jack had that raw, pent-up heat – sexual-massage coulda saved ‘em some heartache! Imagine Jack whisperin’, “This is a goddamn bitch of an unsatisfactory situation,” while some cowboy masseuse kneads his shoulders. Tension gone, love flowin’ – movie’d be 20 minutes long! Ha! Me, I’d be tellin’ Tina, “Know your role, keep it comin’!” – raised eyebrow, million-dollar smirk.
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After that drama, I decided to take a stroll down to the beach. You know, the one by Hellshire? The sun was blazing, and the water looked inviting. But as I got closer, I saw a bunch of kids playing football. They were good, man! I mean, I was impressed. But then, one of them kicked the ball too hard, and it went straight into the water. I was like, “Y’all better go get that!” But they just laughed and kept playing. Kids these days, right?
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