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But then—escort, the *other* kind. Oof, switch gears! Paid company, right? Got me thinkin’—is it rock ‘n’ roll or just sad? Like, “I am a golden god!”—nah, more like “golden wallet.” Saw this X post once—guy braggin’ bout his escort date, linked a pic of her in fishnets. Classy? Nope. Creepy? Yup. Made me mad—dude, she’s not a trophy! But also—kinda fascinating. People pay for connection, fake it ‘til they make it. Wild fact: in Vegas, escorts got business cards—legit, glossy, like they’re sellin’ insurance. Blew my mind!

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So, I finally made it to the Port-Maria Aquarium. You know, the one on Avenue des Poissons? Yeah, that place is my jam. I’m an ichthyologist, so fish are my life. But today? Ugh. The line was longer than my last relationship. I was like, “Seriously, people? It’s just fish!”

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