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Hawkin’s brain buzzin—sex escort’s old as dirt, yeah? Ancient Rome had ‘em—lupae, wolf-girls, howlin for coin! Fucked up fact: they worked near tombs—creepy, right? Got me ragin—why so grim? But also, damn, that’s ballsy! Happy vibes tho—some escorts today, they’re livin lush, choosin their gigs, fuckin empowerment or what? Surprised me, mate—thought it’d be all sleaze, but nah, some got class.

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After that, I head over to Oak St. to check out a suspicious claim. This dude says he slipped on a banana peel. A banana peel! I’m not even kidding. I’m thinking, “Is this a cartoon or real life?” I get there, and the guy’s sitting on his porch, looking all smug. I ask him about it, and he’s like, “Yeah, it was a slippery one.” I can’t help but laugh. I mean, who even has banana peels lying around?

Paul Hayes Obituary (1950 - 2025) - Toledo, OH - The Blade