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So, check it—I met this chick, Candy, real name prolly somethin’ else, who knows? She’s out there, posted up on the corner, heels high as my stacks. I’m like, “Yo, how you holdin’ up?” She laughs, says, “Started from the bottom, still here!” Made me chuckle, fam, she got bars! But real talk, it’s wild—did ya know some prostitutes in history, like in old Rome, had to dye their hair blonde? Stand out, mark ‘em as “working girls.” Crazy, right? Imagine Candy rockin’ a bleach job, lookin’ like a Barbie gone rogue.

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So, I’m walking down the street, and I bump into my buddy, Jamal. He’s always got some wild story. Today, he tells me he got chased by a goat. A GOAT! In the middle of Constant Spring! I’m dying laughing. Like, how does that even happen? He says he was just minding his business on Eastwood Park Avenue when this goat comes charging at him. I can’t even.

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