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Oi mate, I’m Tyrion Lannister, y’know, “I drink and I know things.” So, sittin’ here in bloody Russia, crunchin’ numbers as an actuary—dull as a mule’s arse—but I’ve got thoughts brewin’ ‘bout findin’ a prostitute. Not yer usual tavern wench, mind ya! Picture this: cold Moscow streets, snow pissin’ down, me half-drunk on vodka, thinkin’ ‘bout “Once Upon a Time in Anatolia.” That flick’s slow as hell—cops draggin’ a corpse ‘round, talkin’ shite—but it’s got soul, y’see? “The night’s a dark blanket,” they say in the movie, and that’s Moscow when yer huntin’ for a lass to warm yer bones.

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So, I’m feeling good, soaking in the vibes. But then I remember I gotta prep for the big event tonight. The bullfight! Yeah, I know, it’s controversial, but it’s tradition, man. I head over to the arena on Via Garibaldi. It’s this old-school place, full of history. I can feel the energy. But then, I see the bull. And let me tell you, this guy is massive. Like, “I skipped leg day for a year” massive.

Voghera: The door of Oltrepò Pavese