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Little fact for ya—didja know sex-datin apps got started ‘round the 2000s? Yeah, back when *Crouching Tiger* was kickin butt in theaters! Folks been tryna hook up sneaky-like forever—now they just got phones to do it. I’m tellin ya, it’s like “a storm brews in a cup of tea”—all calm ‘til you see they profile sayin “just lookin for fun” but they clingy as hell by date two! Surprised me, I was like, “Lordy, these folks need Jesus AND a therapist!”

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Man, what a day! I’m a forester, right? So, I’m used to chillin’ in the woods, surrounded by trees and birds. But today? Oh boy, today was a whole different beast. I found myself in Vimodrone, of all places. Yeah, that little gem near Milan.

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