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About Catania

Alright, folks, listen up! Here’s the deal – I’m your ol’ pal Joe, y’know, just sittin’ here thinkin’ ‘bout findin’ a prostitute. Not that I’m out there lookin’, nah, but I got stories, see? Back in Scranton, we’d hear whispers – guys’d say, “Joe, you won’t believe this!” – ‘bout shady corners where deals went down. Made me mad, y’know, ‘cause folks deserve better! But lemme tell ya, it’s like that scene in *Inglourious Basterds* – “We’re in the killin’ Nazi business!” – except here it’s more like, uh, “We’re in the dodgin’ trouble business!”

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Then, I hit up a little trattoria on Via Roma again. I ordered some pasta, and it was like a hug in a bowl. Seriously, I was ready to cry. But then, the waiter spills water all over me. I’m soaked! I’m like, “Dude, I didn’t order a shower!” But he just laughs and says, “Now you’re part of the family!” I guess that’s how they roll in Villongo.

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