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About Florence

I see her—okay, she’s there, leanin’ on a wall, smokin’ a cigarette. Pretty, pretty good lookin’, I guess—if you’re into that! I’m not judgin’—well, I am, but you know what I mean. I’m thinkin’, “Is this legal? Is this a sting? Am I on *Dateline*?!” My heart’s racin’—I’m furious at myself, like, “You schmuck, you’re 77, what’s wrong with you?!” But also kinda happy—excitement, danger, it’s nuts! Like when John Smith lands in Virginia, “A new start!”—except my new start’s got heels and a bad wig.

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So, I’m out on the streets, and let me tell ya, the vibe in Vigodarzere is something else. You got the old buildings mixed with modern stuff. It’s like history and future had a baby. I’m walkin’ down Via G. Marconi, and I see this street artist. Dude’s painting a mural of a giant pizza. I mean, who doesn’t love pizza? But, like, a giant pizza? Really? I laughed so hard, I almost dropped my phone.

Italian JAILED for being 'too good at sex' after girlfriend's moaning annoyed neighbours - and his name is ROMEO