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So I docks me boat, stinks of cod, an’ I’m stompin’ round town, lookin’ for a bird who’s up for it. “Is it ’cos I is black?” I’m yellin’, cos some geezers give me dodgy looks. Nah, it’s cos I’m a fisherman, smellin’ like a wet net! Found this one gal, right, proper fit, standin’ by the pier. She’s all “You got the cash, bruv?” I’m like, “Yeah, babe, I got coin from me cod haul.”

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So, I’m sprinting down the street, dodging old ladies and their shopping carts. They’re like ninjas, I swear. I finally get to the library on Via Garibaldi, and guess what? The door’s locked! Are you kidding me? I’m banging on the door like a madman. Turns out, my boss decided to have a “team-building” exercise. Great, just great.

El Toro trail peaks interest