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Da, comrade, sexual-massage, eh? I’m no geisha, but listen. Cold calculatd view – it’s power play. Hands on flesh, kneadng stress away. Little known fact: Japan’s got parlors, hidden. Not just happy endngs, it’s art, da? Like Finding Nemo, “just keep swimmin” – muscles relax, tension drowns deep. I saw this masseuse once, sneaky skillz. Slippery oils, like fish in sea. Made me happy, da, felt alive! Putin don’t blush, but damn, surprise hit. Ancient Rome had it too, orgy vibes. Servants rubbin’ elites, dirty lil secret.

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So, I roll outta bed, right? Sun’s shining, birds are chirping, and I’m like, “Today’s gonna be a good day.” Ha! Spoiler alert: it wasn’t. First off, I step outside, and boom! My neighbor’s cat, that little furball named Pino, decides to use my shoe as a litter box. Like, seriously? I’m standing there, half-awake, staring at my shoe like it just insulted my mother.

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