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About Bari

This chick, she’s standin’ there, all “business is business,” like Aldo R Uticon sayin’ “We’re in the killin’ game!” Laughed my arse off—her wig’s crooked, teeth missin’, but she’s got sass. “Ten bucks, love,” she hisses, and I’m like, “What?! We wants quality, precious!” Made me mad, mate—ten bucks for that? Pfft, scalpin’ Nazis cheaper! But then, surprise—she’s got a mate who’s proper fit, hidden round the corner. Little known fact, yeah? They team up, like them Basterds plottin’.

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But life’s not all bad. I meet up with my buddy Marco later. We grab a pizza at that spot on Via Cavour. You know the one with the crazy toppings? I’m talking about pizza with gorgonzola and pears. Sounds weird, but it’s amazing! We’re laughing, joking about the day. I tell him about Bessie and the milking machine. He’s cracking up.

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