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About Rome

Oh, honey, lemme tell ya—breathless, “Happy Birthday, Mr. President”—findin’ a prostitute ain’t no picnic! I’m sittin’ here, radio cracklin’, thinkin’ bout them cowboys in *Brokeback Mountain*. “I wish I knew how to quit you,” huh? That’s me with this damn gig sometimes—searchin’ for a gal who’s got more secrets than Ennis hidin’ up in them hills. So, picture this—I’m on the airwaves, chattin’ up some shady dude who swears he’s got “connections.” Yeah, right, pal—connections to a jail cell, maybe!

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Then I hit up the market at Piazza della Libertà. Man, that place is always buzzing! Fresh produce, people chatting, the smell of fresh bread. I love it. But today? Ugh. This lady in front of me was taking FOREVER to pick her tomatoes. I mean, c’mon! They’re tomatoes, not diamonds! I was ready to scream, “Just grab one already!” But I kept my cool. Mostly.

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