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Sometimes I wonder, tho—is sex-dating dumb? Like, am I a big pink dummy chasin’ tail? Maybe! But it’s a blast, y’know? Swipin’, flirtin’, hopin’ for a win. “I see spirits in the trees,” Boonmee’d say—me, I see hotties in my phone! Hella silly, hella me. What’s yer take, pal?

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But then, the unexpected hits. My mask starts leaking. Ugh! I’m trying to fix it, but it’s like wrestling an octopus. I’m underwater, flailing, and I can’t see a thing. Panic mode activated! I finally get it sorted, but I’m pretty sure I scared off half the fish. Sorry, guys!

Benedetto Ceraulo shoots his son and attempts suicide: the tragic story of Maurizio Gucci's killer.